Literaire Studentenvereniging Flanor

Maybe you’ve been looking forward to it, maybe you’ve been dreading it, but it cannot have taken you by surprise: it was Valentine’s Day yesterday and it’s everywhere. Whether you’re a big fan or feel the need to proclaim to the world how little you care for it, you can’t really ignore it. And Flanor, apparently, is no exception, so enjoy this Valentine’s Day-themed blog post!

I don’t need to remind anyone of the meaning of Valentine’s Day, we’re all familiar with the celebration of love. And when we see the word “love”, most of us will think of romance first and foremost. Our culture foregrounds romance over all other forms of love. Romance can be beautiful, certainly, but we don’t easily forget it; it’s everywhere at all times. I feel that friendship is rather neglected and at least as deserving of a day in the spotlight as romance. I’m not alone in this, of course; so many people before me have commented on the prevalence of romance, and I’ve seen things like galentine’s day and palentine’s day floating by.

We can go further back if we look elsewhere. In Finland, Valentine’s Day is called ystävänpäivä, which means “friend’s day”. Traditionally it was not a celebration of romantic love, but an occasion to pay attention to friends. You send cards to thank people for being a good friend and to remind them that you’re thinking of them. Of course, the romantic version of Valentine’s Day has been imported to Finland too, and nowadays the trappings of good old hyperconsumerist superhell (the flowers, the chocolates, the jewelry and perfumes, all the gifts you’re encouraged to give – and buy! – your partner) are more and more present. Fortunately ystävänpäivä is not dead, I still get messages from my aunt and grandmother every year.

I’d like to keep ystävänpäivä alive, and in fact, why not spread it further? If Finland can import the American version of Valentine’s Day, I see no reason why we shouldn’t adopt the Finnish version. I always wish people “happy Friendship Day!” on 14 February and I encourage everyone to do the same! And don’t limit yourself to friendship, while you’re at it. We can celebrate queerplatonic relationships too, and if you’re poly, this is a great time to send a sweet message to your partner(s)’ other partner(s) (if you needed an excuse). And sure, there’s no need to ignore your romantic partner(s), because a good relationship is usually built on friendship. Whatever forms of love you have in your life, celebrate all of them!

So, my dear friends, I wish you a wonderful Friendship Day!

Lots of love,

Martta <3